Buying Speakers From A Child Molester Van

Part 1: Listen To Your Gut

It was the summer after my 6th grade year, no, it was my freshman year of high school, ahh, I mean college. Okay, who am I kidding; I was just out of college and old enough to know better. If hindsight is 20/20 and love is blind, then stupidity is somewhere in the middle.

I had just finished my lunch at a strip mall like shopping center with a McDonalds, Subway, Blockbuster and a bunch of mom & pop shops…oh, and a bank. A bank with one of those dreaded ATM machines. One that you could easily withdraw $100 if you were so inclined.

And $100 is exactly what I took out after my encounter with THEM. You see, I was robbed…well, I was bamboozled anyway.

Two guys in an old white window-less conversion van (you know the ones child molesters use in the movies) pulled up beside my car as I was unlocking my door.

“Hey buddy…do you need any speakers,” yelled one of THEM. I paused, I hesitated, I turned around. The rest is history. In a matter of 10 minutes, these two young hoodlums convinced me to walk 75 long yards across a crowded parking lot over the bank with the ATM machine. It’s there that I proceeded to pull out 5 crisp $20 bills which I then exchanged in return for 1 fine home stereo speaker. Oh yes, you heard me right, ONE speaker. And a stolen speaker at that.

They told me that these speakers were regularly $1,034 but were only $200 because the company these guys “worked” for had a surplus…bla, bla, bla. The lies came out smooth and I bought every last one of them. They were expensive lies at that.

So, here’s the application as best as I can see it:

1) Never ever trust two guys in a child molester van and
2) Trust your instinct, LISTEN TO YOUR GUT

Stay Tuned for “Part 2: Listen To Your Gut”