Worse Than My High School Breakup

Two weeks ago is when it started, or rather when it ended. Sleep, that is. I’m usually not one who tosses and turns but as of late this has become a nightly ritual. 2:11am, 3:47am, 4:09am…the night creeps on. Dream after dream after dream after dream.

Life dealt me a difficult decision, one of great magnitude. One that I have yet to experience in my short 30 years of life. You see, I happen to manage a small team of people, all of whom I’d consider friends. The problem is that our business is changing. And change, well, isn’t always fun. Especially when friends are involved.


I had to make a business decision. One that was made in the name of “growth” and the “future of the business.” These very words – “business decision” and “future” fell out of my mouth as I let my friend know she would no longer have a job.

It’s not personal, it’s business.

Yet, here I am the day after and I’m not so sure it’s NOT personal. You see, businesses are run be people. Real people with real families and real feelings. It is personal. Life is personal. And sometimes that makes life hard. Real hard.

So did I make a mistake? I don’t think so. I’m convinced that I made the right decision…no matter how tough it was. But it’s okay to take it personally. In fact, I’m certain my friend doesn’t feel very friendly toward me right now. And that’s okay. That make sense. I delivered some of the worst news possible; she has reason to feel that way. And it’s okay for me to hurt for her.

My dad once told me that life is full of things that we don’t want to do. Dad, I’m learning the truth of those words. I’m also learning that it’s those hard decisions, those things that grow us into men who can experience life to its fullest, a life that is hard at times but a REAL life nevertheless.
-Brian